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May
31

31 May 2007

I had a beautiful dream last night. I was standing there.. Naked to the waist, holding my shovel, cocked like a baseball bat. In front of me, the untold legion of mediocrity concentrated into one hateful soul. And I swung.

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May
30

30 May 2007

Got a joke for you. Plane full of Larry the Cable Guy fans and Carlos Mencia fans hits a mountain and explodes, everyone dies. ….and that’s pretty much the joke. I’d laugh for two weeks straight if it ever happened.

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May
29

29 May 2007

Kattni: Pick two numbers 1-5. Hurry pls.
Ray: 3 4.
Kattni: thx. afk.
Ray: Heh.

I’m going to tell everyone you asked for my digits. – Ray

Oh. By the way. It’s six times. I counted wrong because she came

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May
28

28 May 2007

Kattni: Did you get laid?
Andrew: Ernh?
Kattni: Did you get laid?!
Andrew: Ernh?.. I’ll call you later.

That’s not part of the act. – Jeremy

Jeremy: Eyebrows be all moving across face.
Kattni: Are you high?

It was like

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May
27

27 May 2007

Michelle H: See that’s what you need to do, find yourself a good computer nerd.
Kattni: …I met him at a Linux convention.

Kattni: I mean come on. Dahmer had huge vats of acid in his apartment and was just

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May
26

26 May 2007

Can I tell you all who I think is weird as hell? Michelle. She’s all, ‘I got my hair done.’ and ‘I got my nails done.’ .. I don’t give a damn… – Tanya

Matt: I JUST STEPPED ON MY

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May
25

25 May 2007

I’m bringing my Mini-Maglite to Jorge’s for protection in case he tries to craiglist jack me. – Ray

Kattni: So you’re stickin’ it to me, eh.
Jeremy: If only.

Jeremy: Gah, I am going bald. I’m watching it. I have

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May
24

24 May 2007

I’m a fat man, I can cook. – Matt

So I’m getting the fruit from the cafeteria today. And one of our admin assistants is next to me. So I’m heaping in these blackberries. And it being wayyy too fucking

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May
23

23 May 2007

Patrick: And I redid my wardrobe in khaki/desert tan. >_< I look like a tool in khaki.
Zachary: Wear a man dress.
Patrick: A kilt? : D
Zachary: Whatever they call the traditional desert dress of Arab men.
Patrick: Oh.

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May
22

22 May 2007

KATZILLA. – Jeff

Jeff: I guess it’s like I’m on the phone it’s… Well it’s like when you go swimming, and the water…
Kattni: You don’t swim!
Jeff: …
Kattni: Hahahahah!!!!!
Jeff: Ok, when a hypothetical person goes swimming…

Kattni:

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May
21

21 May 2007

I’m not as durable as I used to be. – Jeremy

I mean, I got some junk in the trunk, but I’m not sporting the stash that some women do. – Kattni

Bill: brb.
Kattni: Ok.
Bill: TIMES FOR TEH

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May
20

20 May 2007

Bobble Cock Rockin’. – Kattni

Now you have a toothbrush here. That’s pretty fucked up… I just realised as I was spitting that sentence out what the implication of that is. – Kattni

LOLCATS be all moving through tubes. –

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May
18

18 May 2007

Entertain me, there’s construction. – Jeremy

I hate to say it, but I hope that hurt. – Mother in Meijer to her child who was acting like a jackass and ended up running his head into my cart.

No dongs

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May
17

17 May 2007

Mike O: It’s fine, I’m not having any side affects, except that it makes me really horny.
Kattni: Are you sure that’s a side affect?

It’s just normal people video taping themselves having sex.  It’s great. I don’t need dvd

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May
16

16 May 2007

I’ve got two hands. – Jeremy

Jeremy: Gunna have to go ask the faculty how those clouds smell.
Kattni: What?
Jeremy: You know… cus they got their noses so far… up in the air…

Kattni: It would take a crane

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